Roommates: How to Handle Difficulties Without Ruining Your Reputation

You are not the only one experiencing difficult roommate issues. I’ve had quite a few difficult college roommates. One roommate that was assigned to me through random selection happened to be a full-time staff member of one of the universities I’ve attended. She yelled at me, snatched remotes and marched and slammed doors in fits of rage. Some of my family members called her boss and the university’s housing director. I called campus police on the young lady. I was offered to switch dorms. The young lady still remains employed for the university. I stayed in my room for 16 hours a day studying. But she kept her job.

Fastforward a few years later. Another roommate randomly placed with me tried to play pranks on me everyday while no one was in the apartment but myself and her. I had a schedule that called for studying in my room for long hours 2 to 3 days a week. She stole my cleaning supplies at the beginning of the school year. They mysteriously appeared at the end of the school year. The young lady left our toilet overflowed and put an ‘Out of Order’ sign on it and then went to sleep. She chose to leave her broken fish tank trash at the front door for 4 months- expecting me to take it out as part of my daily trash routine. She greeted my boyfriend several times without greeting me. Everyday the young lady created trouble for herself.

For months I could not determine why the young lady disliked me so much. I always studied in my room. I did most of the household chores. I always said ‘hello’ when I saw her. My niceness was always met with silence. I barely received an acknowledgement of my presence.

I later found out that my first-year roommate was close friends with a professor on campus-my former boss. I quit this job because I did not agree with the ethics compromised through order of my direct boss.

I also saw a Facebook post on my roommate’s page that mentioned me as being too nosy. The professor, my former boss, pressed the like button. In the situation described I gave dating advice to our mutual friend.

The behavior from my roommate continued throughout the school year after I repeatedly alerted housing personnel of the incidents. I overheard the young lady’s mother try to plead with her to stop her immature behavior. It didn’t work.

At the time of these incidents random ladies on campus started to stare at me with scrunched up faces of disgust. One of my roommate’s friends took issue with me and I never met her. I also began to receive frowns from senior faculty when I attended university events.

During the end of my tenure as a student at the university I decided to continue to do what I’ve always done. Stay to myself. I fellowshipped with my boyfriend, his family and church members.

Today I am known by past roommates and the housing department as the student who earned alot of degrees and always studied in her room. I know that there are still people at that university who do not like me. But I know that a constant reputation of steadfastness and kindness speaks stronger than lies.

If you find yourself in a situation in which roommates have contributed to the demise of your reputation first consider always being the better person. A consistent action speaks for itself. When more people know a person by their good traits the negative connotations associated with that person tends to be forgotten and forgiven.

Secondly, remember the rule that everyone will reap what they sow. A person either reaps good or evil. Eventually, like Trump’s accusers, you will have an appropriate venue to speak out against the atrocities committed. Either the aforementioned will happen or karma will occur to the individual who sought to smear your reputation.

Lastly, avoid the people in your life who bring such pain. Life is too hectic and quick to deal with the extra pain. In my case I asked the housing office to not pair me with the troubled roommate in a living situation again. My request was honored. I also stopped speaking with our mutual friend. You have to determine the actions that are best for your situation.

Thanks for reading.

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